Mission Scripture

Mission Scripture

Wednesday, June 24, 2015

Six More Weeks in the City

The cost of discipleship is that you have to allow your will to be swallowed up in the Father's will. You have to give yourself up and let go of your desires, even if those desires are righteous. Sometimes we want good things, but the Father has better things for us. My desire was to finish my mission in Danbury. I love Danbury. The people here are amazing, and I will forever be grateful for the time that I've had to serve here. If the first few sentences of this email haven't given it away yet, I'll tell you what's going on. I'm being transferred again. We got the call on Saturday night. This one was a tough one for me to swallow.  Still is. When we got the news I was pretty upset. I was angry and hurt. This wasn't the way it was supposed to end. I was supposed to stay in Danbury, watch Brother Dan and his son be baptized, and come home rejoicing. I didn't understand why I couldn't just have that. Was that not a righteous desire? Would I not be able to serve the Lord well in this area for six more weeks? I didn't sleep very much on Saturday night. In fact, I crawled into bed still angry, hoping I would wake up in the morning feeling better about the whole thing. I woke up Sunday morning, still upset. It has taken me a few days to overcome my emotions. I've started to think about the Savior. Not comparing myself to Him, but did He not have a similar (much more intense) experience? When He was in Gethsemane, knowing that He would soon be crucified, and asked His Father if there was any way He could not go through with it. "Nevertheless not My will, but Thine be done". For a moment, He wanted to pull the plug on the whole thing, but He so quickly understood that His Father's will was much more important than His. He had agreed to be the Savior and fulfill the Plan of Salvation. He was on His Father's errand and wasn't there for Himself. I was being very hard-hearted and selfish when I was presented with this change. I've been reminded in the last few days that I'm not on a mission for myself. I didn't agree to serve a mission so that the whole thing could go my way. I did this to serve my Father, and I ought to be willing to do what He asks. I'm still sad about leaving Danbury. It breaks my heart. But at least now I have calmed down enough to realize what I need to do. There is a scripture in the Old Testament that has become a motto for me in the past few months as the homestretch of my mission has come with a lot of unexpected turns. Isaiah 55:8-9. His ways are always higher than our ways. The Lord had a purpose for me being in Danbury for six weeks. He has a purpose for me in the six weeks I will spend in my next area. I don't know when I will see or understand that purpose, but all I can do is put my trust in Him and move forward with faith. Now that you see a glimpse of how I feel about this transfer, I'll tell you where I'm going to finish my mission. I'll be in a family ward on the upper east of Manhattan, back in my last zone. My area boundaries are partially the same as what I was covering when I was in the YSA ward. Then I was covering the whole east side of the island. Now I'll just cover about 40 blocks North and South. I'm sure I will love the area and the people, and I'm quite sure it will be difficult for me to leave there in six weeks. One more thing I wanted to share with you guys this week. I finished reading the Book of Mormon this morning for the 5th time. Just as true as ever. I have a personal goal to read it again before I come home in six weeks. Last time I did a timed Book of Mormon read was when some of you joined me for the 120 day challenge, which I thought was amazing. Now I have to do it in just 42 days. You don't need to read along with me for this one. It will be a lot of reading, and I have the luxury of having an hour each morning to study the scriptures. I would encourage you to continue to read the Book of Mormon at your own pace each day. I promise you will be much happier if you do that. I'm excited to continue to allow this amazing book to change me for the better. Now we're on the last lap everybody. I'll see you in six weeks! This will be the shortest six weeks of our lives!! See you soon. Love you!

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